A Christmas Card to the Burg
by BeastNamedKay
Summary: Christmas is finally here! The Manoso family Christmas card is something to behold as usually but how do the gossip mongers from the Burg take it. Even more important, how does Helen deal with the Burg?


**Hey! Sorry it's late! I promised you guys it would be up by this time yesterday so again I apologize. This is un-beta-ed so sorry for my mistakes. Spell and grammar check can only do so much. I am looking for another beta so if any of you have suggestions I would be happy to hear them. And if it's not too much to ask, can you review? Please? I beg you? **

**PS: I am going to start revising Out of the Darkness next! Yay! For this one, I want to get a few chapters done before posting so that I am a little ahead. Therefore it will probably be the Saturday after next by the time I upload something.**

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"Nathaniel!" I scream. "Get down here now!"

"But, Mom, this outfit is so unbecoming," Nat says, shuffling down the hall.

"I don't care! We need to take these pictures!"

"Son, just get down here. Your mother looks like she is about to cry," Carlos says with a smirk. That sent him running.

Nat walked down the stairs in his Manoso man bracelet, a red button up shirt, a black tie, black trousers, and black Converse (which is, consequently, the same thing Wyatt is wearing). I think that he looks adorable but mom is never right!

"Oh come on, Nat! It's Christmas! Be cheerful!" Cassie says wrapping her arms around Nat.

"Yea, it's easy for you to be cheerful! You got to pick your own outfit!" Nathaniel says to her. I must say, she picked really good. Our colors for the picture are black and red so Cassie put on a black cap sleeve jersey dress with a red Tory Burch belt, red ballet flats, the Manoso woman bracelet, drop diamond earrings, and a silver bracelet with thin loops.

"I tried," Cassie says.

"Nattie! Be nice!" Lele says, walking up to him with her hands on her hips. This is the first year she has gotten to pick her own outfit and I must say she is her mother's daughter! She picked out a black and red dress, heart shaped earrings and necklace, her family bracelet, black Mary Jane's, and a black headband.

"Sure, little thing," Nat says picking her up. If he doesn't listen to anyone else, he listens one of the five year olds. Only one though since he doesn't listen to Wyatt.

"Babe," Carlos says shaking his head.

"Carlos," I say. "So how do you want us, Celia?" Celia is Carlos's oldest sister and she is a photographer. We usually commission her to do our family pictures. And I use the word 'commission' lightly as she refuses to be paid.

"Um, Steph in the chair, twins on the arms, Carlos directly behind the chair, and Cassie and Nat on either side. Sound good?" she says.

"Well, you're the fofessional," Wyatt says in his five year old English with a shrug. He is so adorable.

"Why don't you wrap your arms around the little midgets?" Celia says. "And Nat, it would be helpful if you got closer to everyone, sort of as if you liked them."

"Nat, behave," Carlos and I said at the same time.

"Ready?" Celia says. "Smile!"

Right as she was about to take the picture, Dante and Roxanne (our family dog and cat) came running into the living room and jumped on Nathaniel, causing him to fall onto Ranger which caused Cassie to fall forward, knocking Wyatt on top of me with his head in Lele's lap.

"How did I know that this wasn't going to be a normal picture?" Celia says, laughing her ass off.

"Probably because it never is!" Lele says, jumping off the chair.

"Well, it turned out pretty good. The only ones smiling is Waverly and Dante but you know, whatever works," Celia says looking at the camera.

"Oh, Christmas, how I love you," Carlos whispers under his breath.

"Carlossss!" I scream. Oh God, all I wanted was a normal Christmas picture. Just once! I love my crazy family but can we not settle down for five minutes to take a picture?

"Babe, calm down," Carlos says soothingly, rubbing my shoulders. Unbeknownst to me, I had started to cry and said my whole rant out loud.

"I'm for sure Dante and Woxxie didn't mean to be cwazy, Mommy," Wyatt says, walking over and hugging me. Well, hugging me as much as he could with my stomach in the way.

"I know, baby. Mommy is just a little hormonal," I say into his hair.

"Woronal?" Wyatt says with that cute little wrinkle he gets in the middle of his forehead when he is confused.

"No, Wy, _hormonal_," Waverly says to her brother. She has always been better at talking but he is more coordinated so it balances out. "You gotta say the word Mommy called Miss Rocker first then say _monal_ at the end." At this I got several startled looks. What can I say, I speak the truth.

"Did you want to take another picture, Steph?" Celia says after her shock at Lele's words.

"Nah. We're the crazy Manosos. Who would be expecting a normal Christmas card?" I say with a laugh.

Sometime in January

"Mmm, that Stephanie needs to learn to tame her family," some old lady whispered behind me.

"I know! That Christmas card of hers was just disgraceful. I feel awfully bad for that Helen, having such a wild daughter," another lady whispered back.

My mother, who was buying some meat a Giovanni's turned and nudged me behind her. "Excuse me?" she says to the women.

"Oh, nothing Helen," the first lady said. "We were just talking about how disappointed you must be in that daughter of yours."

"Last time I heard, your daughter was still in high school after failing three times, Jennifer. Need I mention both of _your_ daughters, Clarisse, got divorces because they cheated on their husbands?" my mother says to them, the venom in her voice undeniable. Both of them just stuttered. "That's what I thought. So before you judge my children, take the time out to think about your own."

Quickly paying for the meat, Mom grabbed my hand and dragged me out of the store and into her Buick. "I am so sick and tired of the Burg's judgmental ways. They all act like they have large sticks up their asses. Next time they say something about me or mine, I will personally see to it that Bobby surgically removes it."

"Wowzers, Mom, I didn't know you had it in you," I say.

"Where do you think you got it from?" she says with a raised eyebrow. Can _everyone _do it but me?


End file.
